When I say I want to be boring, I mean that I want a life where there’s not much to report. I’m just living and being with love and loving relationships. Ordinary. Extraordinarily ordinary.

When I first started blogging, it was to share the fantastical events in my life. I couldn’t help but write because I was in awe. I was immersed in the experiences. It was so easy to write, too. The stories flowed out of me, all the way to moving to Bali.

A short way into living in Bali, more fantastical things happened right up to the point that I saw my death in a past life. That was the last blog that was a part of a very consistent series. Since then, they’ve eeked out at times, not so fantastical, but poignant, like my observations during vocal rest of what it’s like to be completely silent, observing how people responded to me and how unnecessary words are when you’re speaking heart to heart as I did with my niece and nephew.

The simple things.

I have two favorite operas: one a comedy and one a tragedy. Both are about everyday life in a regard, although Verdi certainly leans for dramatic Shakespearean, romantic, and magical flair. Falstaff touches me with the message in the last song, to laugh at one’s self and not take life so seriously, like the dramatic, romantic, and magical.

The tragedy is an operatic adaptation of the play, “Our Town.” Everyday life in New Hampshire, small town, and the most poignant moment is the aria, “Emily’s Goodbye,” which I have also sung.

While I was in Bali, I did an opera performance at a venue with improv scenes. It was amazing. We wanted to replicate this, so we came up with another concept. “Magic in the mundane.” I wanted to sing Emily’s Goodbye along with other arias to tell a story of how the simple life is where it’s all at, which was ironic as I was living a very adventurous life in Bali.

I never sang that concert. My accompanist was ill and then I was. Something in me was drawn to this.

This concept of simplicity has come back in songwriting. I wrote one song which ends with the words…

What if I said yes

To something I’ve run from

Only to find, my heart

Had been calibrated all along

My head was misaligned

Maybe I had it all figured out, I just needed to make simple adjustments rather than throw my life into the universal blender. Did I need to go on all of these adventures?

I went on these adventures because I thought I was missing something. I thought there was something to find and I didn’t trust that I could simply have it. I also… well, I also let myself get carried away with the visions others had for me. I don’t know how many people told me I would be a Met star. The first time, it was a date and I just looked at him funny. “I don’t know if that’s what I actually want.” But, I let myself believe what they saw and I went for it. I didn’t get very far because I don’t think that’s what I actually wanted. It all felt exciting at first.

I feel like Dorothy. I didn’t appreciate the farm and the warmth that was there. I didn’t let myself enjoy it all until I went on a magical journey down the yellow brick road to find my mind, my heart, and my courage and then realized “there’s no place like home.”

Now, I have to say, that I’ve done very little drugs on this adventure. Oz and Wonderland often get associated with experimental drugs. Let me tell you, you don’t need the drugs to go on a trip. Yes, I’ve dabbled, at the pressure of my ex in New York. Mushrooms were a cool way to split the compartments of the mind and also freak you the fuck out. I’m more than capable of that without drugs, I’ve also discovered. Most of my discoveries have been from dream work, songwriting, and somatic catharsis. Very powerful processes for reflection, nervous system regulation, and natural chemical release.

Dreams are so cool!

So, I guess I have some tools that I could have found at home as well, and now, I just want to go home and be home and build community and connect with people in love.

“Love is at the root of everything. All learning, all parenting, all relationships. Love or the lack of it.” Fred Rogers

It’s simple.

So, I encourage you to find presence in the simple, and I include here a link to listen to my song, Simple Life. This is the first play of it that I did for my parents while I was home. It’s rough. I’ve rewritten it since and it will go through one more rewrite at least. The verses have evolved well, but I want to return to the goodness of “earth’s soil and day’s toil” with the chorus. Anyway, I ramble because I’m really good at rambling about creative things.

Finding ourselves is interesting because we were there all along. We don’t need a pilgrimage or adventure or experimentation to find ourselves. It’s more about being and living and we emerge in the being and living. Simply.